Owen the Annoying Bonehead
by HopelesslyObssesedFanGirl709
Summary: After getting kicked out of the Playa for nearly killing some of the campers on various occasions, Owen seeks revenge on his fellow competitors by annoying him. Will Owen succeed or will everyone be able to fend him off. No bad reviews!


**Owen the Annoying Bonehead**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the show!**

**Notes: I am back with another story, mainly because I have writer's blocks for everything else. If you don't like the story, don't flame because they're pointless and if you are going to complain about the story format, just leave the story. Anyways, here it is!**

Chapter 1

"AND STAY OUT, YOU MUTT!" Chef shouted as he kicked Owen out of the Playa and onto a boat.

"But Chef!" Owen wailed, "What did I even do wrong?"

"Are you really too stupid to figure that out yourself?!" Chef half asked, half shouted, "You did many things!"

"Like…" Owen asked, hoping for an answer.

"Okay fine! I'll tell you," Chef sighed, "It all started on Monday…."

_**Monday**_

"_Whoooo! Pancake Day!" Owen cheered as he ran down to the kitchen where Chef was actually making pancakes that tasted delicious._

_Owen loved Pancake Day because he loved pancakes, obviously, but everyone else loved it too and they didn't want Owen to eat all of the pancakes. To prevent this, they all woke up early and got in line before Owen. When Owen got down there, the line was already long. Owen was in no mood of waiting so he casually started to cut the line._

"_Owen, what the hell?! I was here before you!" Duncan yelled._

"_But I have the biggest chance of starving!" Owen pointed out, gesturing to his humungous stomach._

_Duncan rolled his eyes, "Dude, I don't care! Get back to where you were or I will give you an Indian burn!"_

_Knowing that Duncan wasn't lying about that and how much he already hated Indian Burns, Owen cut the line again._

"_Owen! MOVE!" Courtney yelled, "If you don't move, I'll tell Chris and he won't put you in All Stars, but put Sam in instead!"_

_Owen ignored her and continued cutting until he was fourth in line. B was in front of him and Owen knew B wasn't going to move for him. Sadly, Owen's temptations got the best of him so he plowed B over who knocked into the two people in front of him who happened to be Dawn and Cameron._

"_I'm too young to die!" Cameron wailed while being crushed under B, "I haven't found the cure to all cancer yet!"_

"_Actually Cameron, I sense that the person who caused this has a lot of trouble coming their way," Dawn told him._

_Owen ran up to the plate which the pancakes were on and stuffed them all in his mouth, guzzling down bottles of syrup. Owen kept on doing so until Chris came up to him with Courtney right by his side._

"_Chris! He is eating all of the pancakes!" Courtney told him, "He shouldn't be allowed to compete in All Stars!"_

"_I see your point, we don't have enough money in the budget to get more food just in case Owen eats it all," Chris said, "Cody will go in."_

"_NO!" Courtney yelled, "Sierra is already in and that'll just prevent NoCo from happening which will make Gwen happy because she supports Coderra! Sam should go in because he is fat like Owen and will be an easy first boot so there'd be no second guessing on my safety in the game!"_

"_You know, that's not a bad idea!" Chris agreed and went to Owen, "Owen, you are no longer competing in All Stars!"_

"_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Owen wailed as Chris and Courtney walked away._

_Owen soon forgot about this and went on with his day. He saw Noah, Cody, and Harold playing Candyland and decided to join in._

"_Can I play with you guys?" Owen asked._

"_It's, May I play with you guys, Owen! GOSH! How stupid are you?!" Harold corrected him, "Even idiots like Cody know that!"_

_Cody didn't look the least bit offended by this and Owen didn't seem to care either._

"_Yeah, you can play Owen," Noah sighed, "I'm not playing anyways because this game is for little kids!"_

"_YYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!" Owen cheered._

_After 20 minutes of Harold trying to shuffle the cards, the game started and so far, it wasn't going too well._

"_Cool! There's a candy cane on this card!" Owen said in awe, "Does that mean I get a free Candy Cane?"_

"_NO! YOU IDIOT!" Harold yelled, "Cody, tell him what to do because I am obviously too smart for him!"  
Cody was too busy playing Dumb Ways to die on his iPod, "NO! NO! Don't get electrocuted! NOOO! Now I have to start all over again to get the new character!"  
"CODY!" Harold shouted, "TELL OWEN WHAT THE CANDY CANE CARD MEANS BECAUsE I AM TOO SMART FOR HIM!"_

"_What?! Oh sorry!" Cody said, "Owen you go back to the Candy Cane Forest."_

"_And get a free candy cane?" Owen asked._

"_That's exactly what you do!" Noah said sarcastically._

_And with that, Owen started scrambling for candy cane until he got a stupider idea, "Oh! I'm supposed to eat the board!"_

_Then Owen started stuffing the whole board in his mouth. They all stared at him because that was probably the dumbest move they've ever seen over a little kiddie board game._

"_GOSH OWEN! I PAID FOR THAT GAME!" Harold shouted, "YOU HAVE TO BUY ME A NEW GAME!"  
Harold continued to scold Owen so Noah and Cody left to find something else to do. Owen was completely oblivious to the fact that Harold was mad at him and that he ate the game board._

_Luckily, Owen didn't bother anyone else that day._

_**Tuesday**_

_That day, Owen decided to go by the pool. Nobody was particularly happy about this because Courtney was there singing about Duncan and Gwen. The only reason she was allowed to do this because she promised Chris that she'd have sex with him._

"_And you don't even have a real personality! Unlike you, I was a CIT that everyone loves!" Courtney sang while everyone pretended to listen._

"_CANNONBALL!" Owen shouted as he ran into the pool doing a cannonball._

_Everyone was quite grateful for that, but all thankfulness was lost after Owen actually hit the water. He made such a big splash that all of the water started to go out the pool. The water was so violent from his splash that it was making it hard for the other people in the pool to swim._

"_Sadie, I'm drowning!" Katie wailed as she tried to keep her head above water._

"_Katie, I'm drowning too!" Sadie also said, "It is all Owen's fault!"_

"_I was just about to say that!" Katie squealed._

"_Mike, HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPP!" Zoey called, but Mike was going to therapy with Dawn that day because he feared that his MPD would come back._

"_NOOOO! I STILL HAVEN'T MADE NINISHISM AN OFFICIAL RELIGION!" Trent wailed._

"_I STILLL HAVEN"T MARRIED CODY!" Sierra wailed._

"_Don't worry my friends!" Alejandro said, "I shall save you all!"_

_With that, Alejandro jumped into the water and started saving people. Owen was still in the pool alone wondering why everyone got out. Then Nurse Chef Hatchet started taking the people that started to drown and shortly after, Courtney came storming in with Chris. Once Owen interrupted her song and nearly caused people to drown, Courtney yet again went to Chris._

"_Owen, that is not cool!" Chris said frowning, "You could've caused me many lawsuits!"_

"_What did I do?!" Owen said nervously._

_Courtney rolled her eyes and Chris sighed, "Just apologize to Zoey, Katie, and Sadie when they regain conscious in the infirmary."_

_Owen only heard the part about apologizing to them because he went straight over to the infirmary and started squeezing the three girls._

"_I'm sorry!" Owen said squeezing them until they woke up with their faces turning purple._

"_Owen…..can't…breath…" Zoey said gasping for air._

_Since her voice was so faint, Owen didn't hear that and only squeezed them harder. They would've died if it weren't for Mike who happened to come in. Mike was already worried about Zoey and pretty pissed at Owen, but seeing him nearly killing her hit rock bottom_

"_Owen! You are killing them!" Mike said with pure frustration in his voice, but instead of turning into Chester, he managed to pry Owen off of them and shove him against the wall as the three girls regained their breath._

"_Mike you saved us!" Zoey exclaimed happily._

"_OMG! Mike that was like so cool!" Katie said._

"_Yeah! Zoey is like soooo lucky to have you!" Sadie agreed._

"_It was no problem!" Mike said modestly, "I was just worried that he was going to kill one of you guys!"_

"_What about me?" Owen asked._

"_You should go up to your room, find a hammer and hit yourself in the head with it," Mike said calmly._

_Owen being too stupid to understand that they were really mad at him and that hitting himself with a hammer wouldn't help went off to do so._

"_That may have seemed mean, but I can't have him killing anyone!" Mike explained, the three girls agreeing._

_As Mike planned, the hammer hitting Owen in the head knocked him unconscious for the rest of the day. But what Mike didn't know was that Owen was going to cause a lot more trouble._

_**Wednesday**_

_Owen was walking down the hallway when he heard voices coming from a closet. He decided to open the closet to see Eva and B discussing something that seemed to be important. When they noticed him, they stopped talking._

"_Hi guys! What are you talking about?" Owen asked._

"_Should we tell him?" Eva asked B who nodded, "We are talking about how pathetic and terrible people are who are bi sexual or gay! We feel that it is against God to be anything but straight and that everyone who isn't should be imprisoned or killed!"_

"_I know tons of bi sexual people and gay people!" Owen said not even realizing that he himself wasn't straight._

"_Tell us those who are not straight now so we can beat the crap out of these people!" Eva demanded._

_Not realizing that he was friends with many of these people, Owen told them, "Okay there's Katie, Sadie, Duncan, Trent, Lightning, Izzy, Justin, Ezekiel, Chef, Chris, Brick, Beth, Staci, and obviously Noah!"_

"_Thanks," Eva said with a wicked smirk, "B, let's beat these people up and rule the Playa! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"_

_Then the two ran out the closet preparing to destroy all of those people. Owen shrugged and went back to his room so he could watch Cake Boss while trying not to eat his TV._

_After watching a couple episodes, there was a pounding on the door. Owen went to open it to see that Gwen was standing there._

"_Owen, are you nuts?" Gwen yelled, "You flipping told Eva and B all of the gay and bi sexual people in the Playa?"  
"Yep!" Owen responded cheerfully._

"_Well if it wasn't for LeShawna, all of those people you told them would probably be dead by now!" Gwen told him, "And Chris told me to tell you to apologize to everyone that you injured because of your stupidity!"_

_Owen walked down there to see all of the people he listed on hospital beds getting treated by Nurse Chef Hatchet, who Eva wasn't able to harm. When Owen came into plain sight, everyone glared._

"_Owen, what the hell are you doing here?!" Chef shouted angrily, "You already indirectly caused the injuries of these people!"_

"_SHA-LIGHTNING IS 110% STRAIGHT!" Lightning shouted._

"_Most of us aren't even bi!" Duncan snapped, "None of us are gay…except for Noah and Eva just started beating us up! Even me, and I'm like the strongest of them all!"_

"_Well…." Owen said as his voice trailed off he got so nervous that he said something completely different than he actually thought he was going to, "I'm sorry that you guys think that I was lying because you obviously aren't straight?"_

_This caused everyone, injured or not, to attack him. Since Owen was a lot bigger than all of them, he quickly got up. He got up so fast that they were flung at the wall which just got them even more injured if they were. Then Owen decided to leave and go and watch some more Cake Boss._

_**Thursday**_

_After what Owen did the day before, Chef decided he needed a vacation and left the Playa for a day. That meant he left DJ to cook for them which everyone was quite pleased about. Owen, however, was locked in his room, but would be let out for dinner because everyone was sick of him nearly killing everyone. Owen was really bored and hungry so he decided that he'd escape at 4:00 and make himself a snack._

_When four came, he broke the door with his large stomach and started running for the kitchen. Once he got down there, he started grabbing food and putting it on the stove to make something to eat. Since he got tired of waiting to see when it would be finished, he left and went to watch a cooking show so he could see the proper way to use a stove. He figured out too late because the stove was already in flames from Owen's so called snack. _

_Owen had enough logic to leave the Playa, but didn't call 911. Plus, he left his friends there with a kitchen fire that could slowly engulf the resort. In fact, it seemed like nobody knew. Shortly, helicopters surrounded the Playa da Losers and firemen started coming out of the helicopters. _

"_Are you Cameron?" one of the firemen asked._

"_No, but I know someone named Cameron!" Owen said._

""_Would he be in that building?" the fireman asked, "He said there was a kitchen fire!"_

"_Yep!" Owen replied stupidly._

_Then the fireman went to the other firemen and told them something. They all started running in to put the fire out. Suddenly, everyone started running out of the Playa. _

"_Owen! You'll never believe this!" Geoff said, "There was a kitchen fire!"_

_Owen, forgetting that he was trying to make himself a snack, was in utter shock, "Really? I wonder who did it!"_

"_It wasn't DJ because he knows better," Geoff told him, "The weirdest part of it that when everyone went into see what was going on, we got trapped and if it weren't for Izzy saving us, we'd probably be dead!"  
"Wow!" Owen said._

_Shortly, the fire was put out completely and Chris already had his interns take care of the damage done because of the fire. Nobody knew how the fire was caused though._

_**Friday**_

_In the line at breakfast, Courtney marched up to Owen with not only Chris, but Chef too. She was quite irritated about something._

"_Chris, Chef, Owen was the one who caused the fire!" Courtney whined, "I saw him! He went into the kitchen and then left!"_

"_I'd like to hear that from Owen to see if he really destroyed my beautiful kitchen!" Chef snapped at Courtney who frowned._

"_I remember making a snack yesterday at 4!" Owen told them, "Then I left to watch a cooking show!"_

"_I told you!" Courtney said, "Owen is so stupid that he admits everything! First he eats all the pancakes and a Candyland board, then he nearly kills three girls, he tells Eva everyone who isn't straight at the Playa so she can beat them up, fails to apologize to the people he indirectly hurt, and he caught the Playa on fire!"_

"_WHAT?!" Chef yelled enraged, "HE YOU ARE NO LONGER ALLOWED TO STAY HERE ANYMORE!"_

_Without getting Chris's approval, Chef started dragging Owen out of the Playa da Losers._

"I still don't understand what I did wrong," Owen said blankly as Chef facepalmed.

"YOU NEARLY KILLED MANY PEOPLE AND DESTROYED THE PLAYA!" Chef yelled and then threw Owen on a nearby boat, "You are hereby banished from the Playa!"

Then, Chef turned the key, set it on full speed, and placed a rock on the gas pedal. Owen was sent zooming through the lake until the boat crashed into a different island. Owen got off the boat. He was still quite confused with why Chef did that to him. He was so confused that he became very hungry. He started to look around the island to see there wasn't any food. Even looking for it made him hungry. He tried to get the boat to work, but it wouldn't because it was broken. Then he started howling with despair.

**Okay, that was a very cliché way to end the story, but I don't really like writing for Owen. I was originally going to make his story longer, but I decided that I couldn't write a story about Owen being annoying! Therefore, I am probably not going to write many stories about Owen in the future because he is so fricking annoying and already has enough screen time on the show! **


End file.
